Morning Phlegm

"Everything you do, you do for yourself!" That's what you said to me. Words which echo through a tunnel of time and reverb around for an eternity. Words which once said, cannot be taken back, ever! They weave their way to their destination with a sole purpose, a purpose to cut and bleed. What can I say to argue that? What words can I fire back to redeem myself? Is there even anything left to say? Perhaps you're right, perhaps I always knew that, perhaps it's time I give them words a voice and take away the barbed wire that has kept them in silence for so long. Perhaps..... But, you know the truth and so do I, and there's no hiding from that. Salvation doesn't have a place reserved for me, I don't even think she knows my name let alone I exist. So why even try? I'll just let them be as they let me be, in a place filled with regret and memories. I can't breathe, I can't change, I can't fight these words, they're stronger ...

I had no choice to enter this world, nobody asked me where do you want to go or who you want to be? We live in a society of democracy and independence. Every day we are told that this is our right, that is our right and we deserve to choose. We see what happens when freedom is taken away from people and how they suffer. Relationships don't last when there is too much control from one partner, and even governments collapse when they dictate control and take away choice. Ask yourself, how much is freedom worth to you? If someone offered you all the treasures of all the universes in exchange for your freedom, would you sign that deal? I don't think anyone would, you know that, and I know that. But as a disabled person living in a body as a prisoner for over 40 years, without being able to choose whether I want to live or die, to me is nothing but dictatorship and the cause of all of this is one narcissistic fucker! You know him as God. It pains me to write this because for so...